Almost everybody wants to know how to become a more positive person, because the purpose of life is to be happy.
Most people think being happy equates to having mostly positive experiences and avoiding unpleasant experiences.
That often translates to material wealth, no conflict, perfect health and the assured safety and wellbeing of their loved ones.
Sure, having everything turn out exactly as you want sounds great in theory…but not only is it unrealistic, it still doesn’t guarantee happiness. Since you have no control over your physical environment anyway, it makes sense to find another way.
There is one thing you can control and that’s your mind. In fact, with a bit of commitment, you can train it to accentuate the pleasing things in your life, and in turn, attract even more of what you want.
To quote Abraham Hicks: ‘You get what you think about it…whether you want it or not’. Your thoughts create your reality, so here are three simple steps you can take to train your mind to be more positive.
ONE: If It Feels Bad, Step Away From It
Today, I was driving to my optometrist appointment and as the lights stopped, my eyes rested on the bumper sticker of the car in front of me.
It said: ‘Driving against depression’.
This is the way it is with our world…we have a war against terrorism, a war against drugs and a fight against cancer….yet these problems are getting worse.
the Universe doesn’t recognise the words ‘no’, ‘don’t’, ‘fight’ or ‘against.’. It simply hears ‘depression’ and says: ‘You like that…? Here’s more of it!’
So, being more positive starts with the understanding that whatever you put your attention on expands.
Here’s an example:
Suppose you really want some aspect of your health to improve but you’re feeling doubt or fear about it. In that case, technically speaking you’re not focused on health, but the absence of it.
When that happens, you have to step right away from that subject and move to a subject that’s easy to feel good about.
Sometimes that’s not possible, especially if you’re feeling really pessimistic about it. In those cases, meditating or taking a nap can help break the cycle of negative rumination.
TWO: If It Feels Good, Lean Into It
In the same way that when you’re feeling doubt about a subject you should step away from it, when you feel good about something you should lean into it.
So, let’s go back to the subject of improved health. Let’s say that after a few months of healthy eating, you’re really starting to feel a lot better.
Now, you’re feeling more optimistic, so this is the perfect time to give your full attention to the subject; for example, thinking and talking about all the wonderful things you’ll be able to do when you get on top of your health.
As you think more about what you want and feel positive emotions, that momentum builds and you attract even more good things into your life (some of which will have nothing to do with your health).
This is how your minds works.
When you’re feeling good, you attract good circumstances into your life. So, your number one priority should be to find ways to feel good in any given moment.
THREE: Daily Appreciation Practice
To cultivate a more positive outlook on life, all you have to do is focus on something that pleases you for just 30 seconds at a time.
When you put it like that, it doesn’t sound like too much hard work, does it?
Thirty seconds is all it takes to tip the scales in your favour. With that in mind, here’s something I recommend you do every day:
Create a document on your computer. Each day, write down the date. Throughout the day, pay close attention to what is happening. Whenever something happens that makes you feel good, write it down underneath today’s date.
- I had a delicious lunch;
- My friend gave me flowers;
- My partner made me a cup of coffee;
- The sun is shining
Here, you are training your mind to actively look for the positive things in your life. Don’t try to force it. You will find that there are many little things that make you happy or glad, that previously you would have glossed over or forgotten about.
This is about actively paying attention to those things and setting the intention of bringing more good experiences into your life.
Why It Works:
Each time you acknowledge things and experiences that please you, you are saying to the Universe: ‘Yes, I like this. And I’ll have even more of this, please’. The act of appreciation is the fastest way to raise your happiness set point.
When you’re looking for ideas about how to become a more positive person, it’s helpful to know that your mind is the only thing in your life that you have any control over.
Learn how to use it to your advantage and you will experience more peace, ease and wellbeing in your day to day experience.